So in my long life as a "YOUTH MINISTER" I have seen time and time again what I would like to call the (BANE) of the located Youth Ministry. It seems to be at epidemic levels, this mentality that the Youth Ministry can fix my kid when I don't have anything spiritually to do with my child, when I don't read the bible in front of my child, when I am afraid to allow my child to see me pray, and when my church attendance and church giving are at anemic levels. But this new stud Youth Minister can fix lil Billy I know it.
Well I am here to tell you not so much. The time that the Youth Minister and the church for that matter have with your child is very small as compared to the time that you the parents have with them. The child is always going to take the lead of the parents. Your child is the way he/she is because of the example you have set for them. If you don't take time and read the bible...they are not going to read the bible, if you don't make church a priority...they are not going to allow the church to have priority in there lives. A good youth ministry will only start to see fruit three to five years down the road. There is no quick fix in the youth ministry, it takes time, and relationships, and time. All three of these components you the parent already possess. Make the most of the time you already have and read the bible with lil billy. It will make the world of difference. The youth ministry and the church should be the nice side dishes not the main course. The parents should be the meat, the children should come first to the parents and then enhance what the parents are already saying by attending youth ministry and the local church. We want lil billy to be on a good ball team and go to a good school and make lots of money, but do we really have lil billy's best interest at heart. Priorites need to be shifted...then lil billy will be the all around good Christian with the parents leading the way and the church and the youth ministry having there back the whole time.
Lets talk
R
7 comments:
Holy crap! FINALLY... a YM who is saying this! You've nailed it, dude.
In our microchurch network, the #1 question we're asked is "What do you do with the kids?" It's been a cool struggle to see our folks starting coming to the realization (some are closer to this than others) that kids should be a part of the community, not shuffled off into a separate room for someone else to teach. Yeah, it can get a little (or a lot) noisy sometimes, but that's a small price to pay. That, and like you said, what the crap are we parents doing Sunday PM-Saturday PM? If we're not doing anything, the YM stuff is almost useless.
Now... how can the situation be remedied? This, I think, would take a monumental shift in both thinking and practice.
Another good one Rick. It is epidemic and systemic. We practice separate but equal "at church" and expect the YM to fix our kids. In reality many parents just want their kids to behave not necessarily believe. I have found many parents are actually threatened when their kids selll out for Jesus.
There's nothing like the look on some parents' faces when they find out their boy wants to be a preacher or (even worse) their kid wants to go onto the foreign mission field... CPR STAT!
I totally see where you're going. Sounds like some very innovative stuff!
Just one thing--go copy and past the comment you left on my blog and put it here.
Dude, You were saying on my blog about a monumental shift…well here you go. I think we need to simplify the way we do church and we need to combine the ages. If you have kids that are teens, then you are part this arm of the church, if you have kids in the nursery then you are going to the arm of the church. Everyone does the lessons together, does the activities together, everyone does the outings together. I have had to start things from scratch here in R’ville. I have parents hanging out to see what is going on….those parents are my youth coaches now. We almost have to have several different churches within a central church location. When you are teaching the A, B, C’s of the faith it doesn’t matter because the parents don’t know them either. Now this means we can’t do church like we grew up with. It almost means that we really get back to the first century way of doing a lot of what we call church. Does this mean we wont have the numbers?…does this mean I don’t get a paycheck from the church?, So be it! My family has a more complete faith and I am actually taking an active role in my child’s spiritual formation. I hope you can see what I am talking about. Appreciate the comments.
R,
I'm diggin what you've been writing. It does your old roomate's heart good. Keep talkin bro - I'm listening!
You need to read YM 3.0 seems some more youth workers see this shift as well.
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